WE’RE ALL DOOMED!

OLD MOLE’S ONLINE DIARY

TW36 OLD MOLE HENDERSON 1

Tory MP Gordy Henderson about to pen a blockbusting yarn about ISIS drowning Margate maybe..?

So what about this for a story…!

Isis terrorists sneak into Kent and detonate a bomb-filled World War II battleship, sunk in the Thames estuary.  The bombs go off causing the largest non-nuclear blast in history.

This creates a “tsunami”-type wave flooding coastal towns in Kent and Sussex, including poor old Westgate on Sea and Margate.

Blimey!

And as if Margate didn’t have enough problems with Dreamland in financial meltdown!

Reading this astounding story in the local press, Moley went into emergency research-mode.

The battleship in question is the American ship, the SS Richard Montgomery which, one night in 1944, while the captain was slumbering, ran aground on a sandbank in the Thames off the Isle of Sheppy

And the ship did indeed contain 1,400 tonnes of explosives which is still there and which, in theory, if it went off, it would cause one heck of a bang.

So if some ISIS terrorists did find out about this wreck and did manage to set it off…

Wait just a doggone sec, Deputy Dawg…

Moley discovers that bookshelves of writers have been there long before ISIS.

Back in 1977 a novel called Blockbuster has an extortionist threatening to blow the Montgomery up, causing serious flooding in central London.

A few years later the novel The Action of the Tiger theorises that the sunken ship contains America’s first atom bomb, undisturbed since the war until the present when, of course, some nasty neo Nazis find out about it.

More recently the 2009 book Timebomb spins a yearn about a group of European terrorists financed by a “dissident Saudi” (now who could that be?) attempting to ram a semtex-packed speed boat into the wreck.

And finally in the 2010 novel, A Loyal Spy, returns to the idea of trying to flood London (Thanet not being an important enough target of course), by planning to blow up the ship at the same time as a surge of high tide.

All great action-thriller fun, of course, but very unlikely to actually really happen.

The ship’s been sunk in the sea there for over 70 years, most experts think the bombs are extremely unlikely to go off, and would ISIS really take such a big chance at such a complicated plan, when they’ve got much more straightforward methods at their disposal? They may be murderous and fanatical but they’re not stupid.

So then who would seriously hold up the likelihood of some fiendish foreign types blowing up a sunken battleship in the Thames?

Who would have some interest in whipping up fear of alien conspiracies, no matter how far-fetched and foolish?

One of those delirious political chaps who puts ALL our problems down to those ghastly folks beyond the channel, perhaps?

Step forward Gordon Henderson, MP for Sittingbourne and Sheppey.

It was Gordon who asked the transport secretary in September what steps the government is taking to protect the wreck of the ship from the terrible terrorists which in turn triggered these wild headlines.

The minister reassured him by telling him all the precautions they’ve been taking anyway to keep an eye on the sunken explosions.

But our Gordon has form in harbouring fantasy fears of foreigners.

He’s a supporter of the Better Off Out campaign which calls for the United Kingdom to leave the European Union and has stated that the non-Conservative politician he most admires is UKIP’s Nigel Farage.

In fact, so in love was Gordon with our Nige, that in 2014 there was speculation he might actually defect to UKIP.

Eventually Gordon said he’d considered defection but decided against because he viewed some of their policies as “muddled and contradictory.”

Poor old Nigel must be kicking himself that Gordon didn’t  take his shilling.

The man has such a wonderful imagination.

old mole

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s